I was exhausted and sweaty as I looked in the window at the kids club at the gym. I was also a little teary eyed. I was waiting for another parent to come out from retrieving their child and took that moment to watch the bean be bean. She was sitting at a small table coloring a picture with some other children. Every once in awhile she would pause, look up to see who was around her, and then go back to coloring. She had a book next to her, and her doggy on her lap. Those two things have been her security blankets lately. She carries them with her wherever she goes. She has been such a trooper lately, with our busy schedules, our oten impatient, raised voices and our “not now bean, go find something else to do” comments.
As much as we complain that she won’t stop talking, or needs to calm down during lessons, or needs to be a better listener… she is a good kid. A really good kid. A kid that is so affectionate, and so excited about the world around her. A kid that always says thank you. For “downloading Eloise goes to Hollywood on my phone” or for “letting me eat pancakes for dinner” for “stopping at the bakery on the way home” or “for snuggling me this morning”. She is a kid that pats other children’s backs at school when she senses they are scared or plays with them when their best friend is home sick that day. I think about these things and my heart swells. And I can’t help but feel a little guilty that I am not being all that I can be for her.
I think of the strong and amazing mother’s in my life, my friends, sisters, aunts, grandmothers and most of all my mom, and wonder how they do it. Being a mom is such an enormous responsibility, how do they handle that weight? They all make it look so easy. One child is enough of a challenge, how do they do it with two, three, four or five? I feel extremely blessed to have them all in my life, and have learned, and continue to learn, something from every one of them. I look and me and my sisters and the women we have become and think we turned out pretty darn good. A lot of that is because of my mom. She must know a thing or two, that mother of mine. So when I have a hard day, or I feel like I am not giving it my all, I find myself thinking, WWBD? What would Bebe do? It’s what gets me through those days… and some days it is more like “what would Bebe drink?”. Whatever gets you through right?
Happy mother’s day to all you mom’s that keep me going. Especially you Bebenator. Love you Mom!